[blast from the past]

because I'm lazy and TUI (typing under the influence) and I really really felt it was necessary. avid readers will remember the following.

QUOTE:


freedom, I got here too late.

this won't match the standard I've set for myself because simply I'm just too tired now. I'm sorry for getting your hopes up and everything. I know I did. I'm intuitive like that. if I were a superhero I'd walk around with a big N on my chest and I'd be called N-tuitive boy.

but that's not why I'm here.

RUM & COKE is why I'm here.

I think I put too much RUM in the glass. I don't remember how much was in the glass when I stopped pouring. it couldn't have been too much, otherwise my mates would have said 'whoa there matt you'd better watch it' but I don't remember them saying that and now they're gone so I can't ask them. at any rate I filled the rest of the glass with COKE so the RUM was probably pretty diluted when all was said and done and poured.

I can't find my nice fuzzy warm sweatshirt and it's the time of night when evertyhing starts getting cold.

[liver] DAMN IT matt you've got to stop, give me a freaking vacation
[matt] YOU'LL TAKE WHAT I GIVE YOU AND YOU'LL PROCESS IT TO THE BEST OF YOUR ABILITY
[liver] you're the boss
[brain] matt, he has a point; I mean, even I find it hard to work in this low-oxygen environment. in fact all I can do is this:
[matt] qasoinfg;j WHOA BRAIN WHY IS THE ROOM SPINNING
[brain] lack of oxygen, man. it's all I'm capable of
[kidneys] WE NEED OVERTIME PAY OR WE'RE GOING TO GO ON STRIKE
[matt] OKAY OKAY you organs everything will be okay, I'll just drink this magic elixir and everything will return to normal, like it was yesterday
* matt drinks magic elixir
[brain] THAT'S THE STUFF
[liver] AAAAHH FAILURE IS IMMINENT
[kidneys] UNABLE TO KEEP UP WITH INPUT
[spleen] for chrissakes will you all keep it down? I'm trying to sleep and OH GOOD HEAVENS, WHAT AN INTERESTING SENSATION, I FEEL FUZZY
[matt] thank you magic elixir a.k.a. RUM AND COKE, you have ruined my evening but it feels so nice
[RUM AND COKE] BEHOLD MY MAGIC, I AM SIMULTANEOUSLY WARM AND COLD AND BUBBLY
[matt] in the best possible way.
[brain] this isn't so bad I suppose, HEY I'VE GOT AN IDEA, LET'S POST TO HATELIFE!


:UNQUOTE


being subjected to bridget jones leaves me only so many options. (perhaps more vermouth would have helped.)

-matt.

p.s. jen sister jen, you are not allowed to know what any of it means.